Besides all of those school research I do, I have to do my MA thesis… which is on a topic of Psycholinguistics. My professor and my sempai reviewed my proposal on Friday… which means that I gave a presentation in front of them… yeah, and expectedly, they gave me negative comments about it… I was so confident that I did well this time, but I guess not!! All my work and effort was thrown away into burning fire after looking at it for like 15 minutes. These things happen like all the time, so I am used to it, but still, when people shoot me down without giving it a little more time, and when this kinda thing occurs repeatedly over a year, it can make you sick of life in this school. Though I know deep inside that it my own problem, not the others who shoot me down (evaluate negatively of my work) right away, because it is a fact that you have to have a certain level of academic intelligence in order to survive in the world of academia…, I still feel tired and lifeless. I was literally depressed… and I looked for a solution and found one to this problem of mine.

PARTY IT UP! and HAVE FUN!

I deserved it for god sakes. What I needed was to be able to switch two different modes when necessary. Two different modes here of course refer to the party mode & the study mode. If i only have the studying mode, I just drag myself down to hole of complete silence where I start concerning about stupid little shit, like my own reputations n such. But if I have the party mode, I could use the studying mode more wisely… actually concentrate on the study only, and not other things. Now come to think of it, the best grade for a semester I got during college was when I studied hard, but this was the semester I partied the most. Interestingly enough, there has already been an empirical evidence that I do better with the two modes of partying and studying. I do not know why I didn’t realize that I should use this life strategy here. But now I am glad I did realize.

I partied hard with my friends in Tokyo on Saturday til Sunday morning, made new friends, and didn’t care about anything but the fun of the moment. Sure, I felt like shit when I came back home, and sure, I still have alcohol burns on my tongue even now. But I have never concentrated on my studies more than ever before. I have been doing so much stuff since Sunday night – Tuesday night so far. I have a feeling that I can keep up my concentration, until Friday, because I know I can switch my studying mode to my partying mode on Saturday. Even if I had to sacrifice some braincells for the best result, I can’t deny the fact that the mode switch is an incredible invention, and there is no question of it serving as the savior of my life.

Today I woke up at noon and just looked up potential graduate schools I can apply to for next year. At around 4PM I was hungry so I went to that new bakery around the corner again Because I went at an earlier time than last time, I had more to choose from! Yay!! I got a loaf of white bread (very very silky and soft inside), curry filled bun, cheesy baguette, veggies & tomato sauce on a bun, and tuna & cheese roll. I had some of them and they tasted very very nice. I’m so happy the shop is within the walking distance from my apartment.

Then at around 6PM, I started working on my assignment for class, which is due not until next Monday. I didn’t finish it. Well, technically, I could keep working and finish it tonight because it’s 2/3 done, but I don’t feel like it.

Basically, I felt like I wanted to bum around today, and I did. lol Everybody has a day like this, right?　Happy 引きこもり(hikikomori = someone who doesn’t get out of your room all day, or the act of.)！lol

Though I gotta admit… when I am not productive, I do feel guilty at the end of the day…

Yeah, it’s going, slowly…

I’m currently looking into U.C. Davis’s Anthropology program. Considering my research interest, I would love it if she could be my supervisor!! I should read her published articles and books, and see

http://www.anthropology.ucdavis.edu/anthro/fprofile/facultyprofile_s.cfm?id=10

School search gets my adrenaline flowing.

Oh yeah, there is a new bakery in my neighborhood and I gave it a try.. They had yummy stuff.